Transcript[]
One day, Draculaura and her friends noticed Ghoulia staring at the trophy case, which had Slo Man Mortavitch’s photograph.
FRANKIE: Something’s wrong with Ghoulia! She looks upset.
CLAWDEEN: How can you tell?
FRANKIE: I’m telling you she’s upset about something. Let’s find out!
Ghoulia groans.
FRANKIE: (taps on Ghoulia’s shoulder and she turns around): Hey, Ghoulia. What’s going on?
GHOULIA: Uhhhh…
FRANKIE: Oh, so you said you like Slo Mo, but you’re too shy to talk to him?
GHOULIA: Uhhhh.
CLAWDEEN: Don’t worry, honey. Your Ghoulfriends are here to help.
(The Ghouls huddled together)
CLAWDEEN: Okay, ladies, let’s do this. (Later, she puts a hearing aid in Ghoulia’s ear) . The most important thing to remember, Ghoulia, is, no matter what happens, do not be yourself! Draculaura will tell you exactly what to do. Got it?
(Ghoulia smiles awkwardly, attracting a fly). Uhhh…
(The school bell rings, and we see Slo Mo approaching).
FRANKIE: Status: He’s approaching Coffin Corridor!
CLAWDEEN: Ghoulia’s not ready! Frankie, invasive maneuvers, go!
(Frankie dutifully launches herself toward Slo Mo, but it is too late! She fell towards the ground.)
FRANKIE: That was for you, Ghoulia.
(Clawdeen quickly shoved Ghoulia into Slo Mo’s way).
DRACULAURA: Compliment him, and point out how beautiful his eyes are!
Ghoulia, however, groaned, and pointed at Slo Mo’s eyes.
SLO MO: Uhhhhh…
DRACULAURA: Show him how interested you are in him. Smile.
But Ghoulia’s cheerful smile attracts a housefly. Slo Mo blinked.
DRACULAURA: Here’s what you need to do: Toss your hair gently, and lean in to hear what he has to say.
Tired of Draculaura’s talking, Ghoulia tossed her hearing device and looked at Slo Mo lovingly.
GHOULIA: Uhhh…
SLO MO: Uhhh…
Hand in hand, both zombies walked the halls.
DRACULAURA: I can’t wait until I’m 1,700 years old, and I can date.
CLAWDEEN: See? Just like I said, all she had to do is be herself.
(Record needle scratches)
THE END.